Staring at…his butt.

After work I hit up the gym for a workout.  Hopping on a bike, I was about to crack open my latest read when I glanced up and saw it.  There was a handsome young guy running on the treadmill just a few feet in front of me, and my eyes were immediately drawn to his butt.  I couldn’t stop staring!  I would pedal faster and hold my book up higher, trying to divert my attention, but soon my eyes would be peering over the pages…staring.

I looked around at the others around me.  There was a girl doing abs on my right.  “Doesn’t she see this guy?” I wondered.  An elderly woman walked past, right behind him.  “Why is she not staring?” I pondered.

I kept trying to workout without peeking, but I couldn’t help it…my eyes kept wandering back to his butt!  His muscular arms would wipe the sweat from his brow and then he would wipe his hand on his back end as he ran.  “Oh, there you go!  Just a little to the right!” I nearly mumbled out loud.

Believe me when I say, I was THIS CLOSE {holding up fingers a cm a part} to running back to my apartment and getting my cellphone to discreetly take pictures of his…well, you get the picture.

Finally my staring paid off and I got what I wanted.  In slow motion, his bulging biceps wiped his sweaty brow and then reached back…back…back…to wipe it on his short little shorts…and he FOUND IT.  He found the LONG string of TOILET PAPER that was stuck and hanging out like a nearly 2-foot long TAIL from his back end!!!  He ripped it off and nervously chucked it, looking left and right to see if anyone saw.

No one saw.  Well, no one except the girl on the bike several feet behind him.  That girl saw EVERYTHING.

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