What Happens in Vegas, Stays in Vegas

At only $45.00 per night on Expedia, I was expecting my Vegas hotel to be a dump. So my eyes widened as I walked into the “lobby” to see rows of slot machines, glittering chandeliers, scantily clad women serving drinks, 4 restaurants, a bowling alley, tables and tables of people rolling dice, BINGO, a spa, an ice cream shop, a “show” room, valet parking, a store, a coffee shop, a 24-hour fitness center and 2 outdoor pools. There were bright flashing lights with dollar signs and the “cling cling” of slots ringing in my ears. I debated playing some BINGO or slots…but was so tired from getting in late that I went up and rented “Mad Money” for $10.95 on my plasma tv (yes, I had a giant plasma tv on my wall).

The next day I couldn’t take it anymore…temptation aroused in my soul and I had a one-track mind. It was all I could think about…I looked around wondering if anyone would recognize me. I had just checked out of my room and lugged my suitcase and laptop bag behind me, stepping into the blinding light. Sitting down, surrounded by men without their shirts on, I nervously unzipped mine…my hoodie that is, revealing my white wife beater style tank underneath. Scandalous. I pulled up both my pants legs on my jeans as my eyes shifted around. “Only 20 minutes”, I thought to myself. “Just 20 minutes of dangerous pleasure!”

You see, as a Licensed Esthetician, I know what 20 minutes of unprotected sun-worshipping by the pool can do for my skin. But for a moment, I didn’t care. I laid there, without a drop of SPF on, soaking in the harmful UVA and UVB rays, my skin sagging and wrinkling and leathering with every sinful moment…and then just like that, it was over. I stood up, put my hoodie back on and pulled down my jeans, making a beeline for my rental car so no would ever ever EVER find out my secret.


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